I’m one of four siblings and I’m the ONLY one who helps with our parents. Dad had a stroke last year and mom has arthritis so bad she can barely cook.
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Every time I bring it up, they’ve got excuses. The resentment toward my siblings is eating me alive.
This doesn’t get talked about enough.
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Elena Vasquez writes HappierFit's caregiver column — the load, the guilt, and the logistics of caring for parents while raising kids. One of our named editorial voices, produced with AI under BRICK30's editorial standards.
3 thoughts on “My siblings won’t help with our aging parents”
Lisa_M_caregiver
I could have written this post word for word. What finally helped was having a formal family meeting — not casual, an actual meeting with an agenda. I listed everything I do in a week for our parents. When they saw it in writing, two of my siblings stepped up.
the resentment is the hardest part. i found that my anger at my brother was actually making my caregiving worse because i was constantly stressed about TWO things
Even if siblings won’t help in person, they can help financially. My sister lives across the country but she pays for a home health aide 3 days a week.
I could have written this post word for word. What finally helped was having a formal family meeting — not casual, an actual meeting with an agenda. I listed everything I do in a week for our parents. When they saw it in writing, two of my siblings stepped up.
the resentment is the hardest part. i found that my anger at my brother was actually making my caregiving worse because i was constantly stressed about TWO things
Even if siblings won’t help in person, they can help financially. My sister lives across the country but she pays for a home health aide 3 days a week.