Small wins: celebrating tiny victories in caregiving
Ok so I've posted a lot of heavy stuff in here and I want to balance it with something good because this week actually had some bright spots:
1. My dad remembered my birthday. It was last Tuesday and he woke up and said "happy birthday kiddo" like he always used to. I ugly cried for 10 minutes but like... happy tears.
2. I found an adult day program that he actually LIKES. He goes 3 days a week and he looks forward to it. He calls it "his club." I get 18 hours a week back. EIGHTEEN HOURS.
3. My teenager cooked dinner without being asked. Just... made pasta. Told me to sit down. I think he's starting to understand whats going on and he's trying to help in his own way.
4. I slept 7 hours straight last night for the first time in months. MONTHS.
I know things are still hard and they're going to get harder. But today was good. And I wanted to document that because on the bad days I need to remember that good days exist too.
Lisa this made my whole day. The birthday thing... man. Those moments of connection are everything. Hold onto that one tight.
And your son cooking dinner? That kid is learning more about empathy and strength from watching you than he'll ever learn in a classroom. You're raising a good human, Lisa. Even when it doesn't feel like it.
I'm crying at my desk at work reading this so thanks for that lol. But seriously — documenting the good days is so important. Our brains are wired to remember the hard stuff more vividly. Having a record of moments like these is a gift to future you.
Also 18 hours a week back!! That's life-changing. I'm so glad you found a program he enjoys.
The day program is wonderful news, Lisa. Social stimulation for dementia patients has been shown to slow cognitive decline and improve quality of life. And the fact that he enjoys it means it's a good fit — that's not always easy to find.
The 7 hours of sleep is also clinically significant. Chronic sleep deprivation (which you've been dealing with) has cascading effects on every system in your body. Getting consistent sleep again will improve your cognitive function, emotional regulation, and immune response. You will literally think more clearly and feel more resilient.
Celebrate these wins. You've earned them.